I spent all day updating my WordPress site. I drafted and redrafted my about statement. Added an SEO plugin. Changed the theme. I even tried to edit the colors and font for gods sake. After hours of work I still felt dissatisfied and lacked clarity.
It wasn’t until I got off my ass and went for a walk that I could clear my head. Movement is the best solution to brain fog and the antithesis of stagnation. Try it.
Anyway within minutes of starting to walk my focus narrowed to a pin prick, and I quickly drafted a new about statement as I walked. And it felt fricking good. If you’re reading this now you can read it here.
But back to the topic at hand – why is it so hard to get clarity? I’ll tell you three main reasons why it was so hard for me today.
1. Comparing yourself to others
I spent a good portion of today looking at my favorite writer’s websites, which just made me feel even crappier about mine. I felt like I’d never compare. No one would look at my blog and take me seriously.
Comparing yourself to others, especially famous and well established people is a terrible idea. Focus on yourself. You are the only expert on you out there. You have something different to offer. If you focus on others at best you’ll become the dollar store version of them. And no one will have the benefit of seeing the real you. It’s a lose/lose.
2. Not understanding why you’re doing something
To be honest with you I wrote this blog for myself. Of course I want people to read it but it’s not why I do it. I write because if I don’t I feel awful. I went months this year and all of last year barely squeaking out a post once every few weeks. Sometimes months passed without any words. I don’t want to live like that.
I have been writing since I learned to write. I have stacks of journals full of teenage ruminations, poems, songs, and lists of life goals that include writing a book. I’m working on that too.
Writing is a compulsion. A deep need to communicate. I write to understand myself, my feelings, and the world I live in.
I write this blog for me so I can share it with you.
3. Second guessing yourself
We are our own worst enemy. The critic in our head is often the harshest, most demeaning, cruelest one we’ll ever come across. Go easy on yourself. This is a journey remember? We’re on the search (more on this to come) and it’s ok to not be perfect.
Today I was guilty of all three things – comparing myself to others, not understanding why I was doing this, and second guessing myself. It was impossible to get any clarity. When I went for a walk I stopped doing those things and focused on myself and with that came a torrent of precise thoughts.
Sometimes you have to get the f up and move to stop the vicious cycle. But the key is when you do pay attention. Trust the clarity when it comes and take action.
Until next time.
Always on the search.
