I was listening to the Waking Up podcast with Sam Harris today. He usually does a long intro and I find these intros just as interesting and thoughtful as the discussions he attempts to have with other people. In the episode today (#145) he said something that has stuck with me that I’d like to share. Here is the quote:
“The next time something happens in your life that makes you angry or afraid or sad how long will you spend locked in the prison of one of those emotions?
And what will you do there?
What indelible mark might you make in your life or in our world on the basis of one of those emotions?”
He was talking about the benefits of meditation and how we are so bombarded with information. How consumed by our devices. How inept we are at handling our emotions or even acknowledging them in the moment and then allowing ourselves to choose to move on.
I realized, hopefully not too late, that I’ve chosen to stay locked in anger and frustration recently. It hasn’t helped me or the people that matter to me one bit. And instead of thinking how I can use the emotions to drive me to make a positive mark on the world, I’ve lingered and indulged them.
You can see this in my work. My relationships. My parenting. My writing. I’ve let negativity sap my ability to give the best of myself. I’ve made choices to stay here. To be a jerk. To be bitter. To be angry. To curse. To be impatient. Did it help? Nope.
So how can I feel the emotions but make the choice to let them go? And ultimately what mark do I want to leave on the world and the people I care about? These are choices that are critical. And critical choices require commitment.
This is me committing to making those choices. And making them each time something happens that is not ideal. I can’t waste another second. And for those of you that love me I can do better.
