2021

I didn’t post as much this year as last. I didn’t have a goal to post daily and my writing was kind of sporadic. At least what I shared. But I’ve been writing a lot. And my goal in 2021 is to keep writing a lot. Like a book a lot. Ok a book. I’m going to write a book. Don’t ask me what it’s about. That’s nasty. It might not go anywhere. It might be poop, but I’m still doing it. I’ve had “write a book” on my to do list since I was a little kid. I’m not a little kid anymore. It’s time.

2020 didn’t even feel like a year. It felt like the same long dismal day over and over and over again. Like so many times I asked myself is this even real?

I think it would be easy to look back and list out a lot of awful things. To name all the flaws with the world and the people in it. We can’t escape it anymore. They are abundant and abundantly clear. But I’m starting 2021 feeling very deeply grateful.

I can’t emphasize this enough – my wife is a super hero. What I think is impossible she shows me isn’t. Today, for example, we moved two heavy ass wooden twin beds from our basement up to the second floor with only a few dings in the walls and two small injuries to her fingers and toes. She has a vision and then unlike a lot of people just goes and gets it done. I am afraid of so many things and I probably wouldn’t do or have done many things without her unwavering ability to make it happen and make it all end up alright. I decided this year that I don’t want to be a thing that stands in the way of her big dreams. I want to be right there by her side for them. And there are big dreams to come this year and beyond.

I am so grateful for my boys. I get lost looking at their beautiful faces. I am astounded by their humor, intelligence, dance moves, and empathy. They might crunch goldfish all over the floor but they are good boys. Watching them grow is a goddamn miracle. I feel my moms soul rejoicing when I hold them in my arms and marvel. I look forward to growing older with them. There aren’t enough kisses and hugs in the world.

I’m grateful for my brothers. Fortunately, unfortunately I have spoken to them more this year than many other years. They call me and more often than not (unless you ask Tom) I pick up. I’m notoriously awful about phone calls. But I’m trying. And I’m thankful they even want to talk to me after what a shit head I’ve been in the past. Having big brothers is a wonderful gift. I know my parents would be proud of them.

I am so grateful for the small harem of friends that I’ve kept in touch with. That I can reach out at random and talk. That I get silly texts and cat videos and utter insanity from most of you is just so wonderful. That you never say why has it been so long since you called? You accept me in all my utter madness and absurdity. My moods. My whining. My food posts. Thank you for any and every little message you’ve sent me this year and keeping that friendship spark lit. I hope to see you this year, in person, and to give some big bear hugs.

I’m grateful for so many things it’s hard to list them all. I’ll try a few –

Aunt Sheila – you always remember. And did you know you have the same handwriting as my mom? I feel a piece of her in you and that’s so special.

Coffee – I could not. Don’t make me try. Never leave me.

Chocolate – see above

Dance parties in the living room

Wynonna Earp

Portrait of a Lady On Fire

Libby app – so many good books this year (maybe another post?)

Having a good job and team

My new slippers

Wearing shorts for an entire year

My fountain pens

Faith, hope, love

Bobs Burgers

Lastly, I am so grateful for writing in all its myriad forms. My friend Ryan’s texts are better than pretty much anything I’ve ever written. My blog. My journals. Scrivener. Thinking back to when I started this blog – I took a leap. I did something new. I shared my writing. I committed to doing it. And I’ve stuck with it. I’m not sure if I need to post every day or just when I feel like it. Perhaps somewhere in between. I just know I need to write. Every day. Even just a few words. Pen to paper. Keyboard to iPad. Text to friend. Whatever. Write. And then write some more. And then write some more.

I’m looking forward to a new year of writing and sharing and to big goals. Happy 2021. Let’s go!